EARRING AND POST HOLDER "FLY" INTO EAR!

Journal Entry
Sunday 09/19/2004
Around 2:30 a.m.

Having slept flat on my back, I am awakened by a persistent buzzing in my right ear. The sound reminds me of a cell phone on “vibrate” only louder. At the same time, I feel a load in my ear and weird movement. Startled, I jump up and cry, “There’s a giant bug in my ear!” and I shake my head wildly to get it out.

But to my amazement, rather than a bug, two objects fall into my hand: my right earring and the earring post holder. I am so relieved I didn’t find an insect! However, I am perplexed. How could these two objects have “traveled” from my earlobe up into my ear as I slept?

Indeed, I have outlined the following questions for anyone who would like to analyze this one:

1. How does an earring travel from the pierced part of the earlobe into the ear above it, rather than below it? Is it possible for an earring to move or “float” into one’s ear while one is asleep? I suppose it is possible but highly unlikely. The force of gravity ought to enter into play here.

2. A post holder secures a pierced earring in place. Of course, the holder itself is secured behind the earlobe. Tell me then, how is it possible for a post holder to travel from the back of the earlobe to the front, and then “float” vertically into the ear above it while one sleeps? Shouldn’t gravity cause the post holder to descend and drop directly onto the pillow or bed?

Yet, in this case, the post holder shifted with a semi-circular motion and ascended before landing in my ear. This is not simply bizarre. It is contrary to natural law.

3. What may have triggered the long, loud buzzing noise? It felt as if this sound and the corresponding sensation (of an energy charge or a pulsing electrical current) had “caused” both of these objects to float or otherwise travel into my ear.

Though stunned by this rather off-the-wall event, I lie down again and try to get some rest. Before long, I fall back to sleep.

*****

Same morning – around 4:00 a.m.

As I glance at the clock, my heart is doing “flip-flops” in my throat because the phone is ringing.

“Who would be calling at this ungodly hour?” Sitting up, I rub my face. “Could be an emergency – better get it.” And so, half asleep, I stumble across the room and fumble around for the receiver.

“Hullo,” I say, not even trying to stifle a yawn.

Yet no sound is coming through.

So I growl, “Hello!” about as cranky as Kong.

Still no response….

So I wait… and wait… still hoping to hear something, anything!

Alas, a click. “They hung up,” I say in frustration, putting the receiver down to rub the goose bumps on my arms. “Must be the night air.”

Resigned, I plop down on the bed and hug my quilt as I replay the mental tape of all that transpired in one wee morning. Even so, I sigh and shake my head. Too full of “stuff” to sort it all out. So I get up, about as frozen as a popsicle, grab my robe and turn on the heat.

With all this tomfoolery, I’m wide-awake now. No point in going back to bed.

Soon, big slippers stomp off in the inevitable direction of the kitchen. “It’s a darn good thing I like coffee!” I say to the walls or anyone who would deign to listen.