INTRODUCTION
Death
Is Not “The End”: One Agnostic’s Journey
on the Bumpy Road to Belief is a journal of real paranormal and
supernatural events. Three hours before
the Christmas Eve of 2003, the soul of Max Blau departed from a hospice in
Tempe, Arizona. Yet, in Oxford, England,
Christmas Eve had already arrived. There
in Max’s former home, sat his family, grief-stricken on hearing that he died on
their most beloved holiday. Yet just
hours after Max’s purported departure, strange things began to happen in Oxford
and in Arizona as well.
Despite
the terrible sadness caused by the untimely death of Max, my husband and
dearest friend in all the world, I soon realized that things were not as they
seemed. During Christmas week alone, I
began receiving telephone calls from loved ones and friends dear to us. Oddly, some of the callers sounded happy, if
not downright joyful soon after Max had left us! In fact, his sisters and even a few of his
close friends phoned to tell me their uncanny stories. From the outset, these incredible tales had a
strange effect on me. You see, I was an
agnostic then. I had no beliefs one way
or another. Nevertheless, after hearing
these eerie tales, I decided to do what I did best – sit at my coffee table and
take notes.
After
obtaining an advanced degree and working for twenty-five years as a
statistician in health care, education and government, I remained, as ever, a
curious person. So, when these events
began to happen, I knew I had to write down the details if I wanted to
investigate further. Then, for
validation purposes, I sent written “reports” to those who kindly took the time
to tell me their stories. If there were
any truth to these rare claims, my notes would have to be corroborated and the
required corrections made.
Then,
amazingly on New Year’s Day, two days after Max’s burial, I began to have
experiences of my own. In fact, I soon
became a party to some unimaginable incidents – in places like my home,
restaurants, cafés, gardens, and even during my first trip to England! As these mind-boggling occurrences began to
“hit home”, I sat at my computer to flesh out the stories – those of our loved
ones – and now mine. Before long and
without much effort, I had a document for each event that I’d previously logged
on paper and saved in a calendar.
Despite the strange goings-on, I kept track of most dates and times of
the events. My background in psychology
and years of logging research study observations had certainly come in
handy. Nevertheless, as you will see, my
journal is written not in clinical form, but in story form.
In
Death Is Not “The End” unusual
phenomena – the explained and unexplained – are called events. The story begins
with the mysterious events of December 23, 2003. It ends with the eye-opening revelation I
experienced on December 23, 2004 – on the first anniversary of Max’s death.
Through
research conducted following the fifty-odd incidents and encounters (and odd
they were), the happenings were later classified into some rather rare and
interesting categories:
the shifting and
displacement of physical objects in and around rooms; apparitions and other
spirit encounters; synchronicities and extreme coincidences; automatic writing;
numinous dreams, the movement of undated coins; intelligent haunts; residual
haunts; uncanny telephone activities; electrical demonstrations, malfunctions
and breakdowns; object alteration; “third eye” phenomena; spirit communications
received through clairvoyance, clairaudience and clairsentience; soul travel;
spirit guide communications; telepathy; validation of “rare” events based on the frequency of
repetition of the events; validation of rare events based on statistical
hypothesis testing; and the discovery of a corroborating written record found
after the occurrence of a supernatural event.
In the Post Script sections
following key phenomenological stories, I discuss and sometimes further examine
an event or review subject matter related to the event. Therefore, post scripts, as discussed below,
are reserved mainly for post-event commentary and research. Although many of the events in the book are
left unexplained, potential explanations are offered wherever achievable, with
respect to key events. Interpretations
are then made wherever possible.
The
timeframe of Death Is Not “The End”
is December 23, 2003 through December 23, 2004.
Nevertheless, the supernatural, mystical and synchronistic happenings
have gone far beyond the boundaries of one journal year, changing my life
forever. Then because of the rare and often challenging life changes I experienced
over a subsequent six-year period, I decided it would be a good idea to
continue journaling. After all, the
supernatural events didn’t stop simply because one journal year ended. No, not in any sense of the word! Consequently, I continued logging significant
events from 2005 onward. On the other
hand, my focus shifted because of a tremendous increase in synchronistic
events, intuitive perceptions, signs, and several communications from Spirit
which came to pass.
As
my intuitive side became clear, I sought to further understand and develop this
ability under the guidance of Sunny Dawn Johnston of Sunlight Alliance. In 2006 while watching a television news
program, I learned of Sunny’s incredible intuitive work at Sunlight Alliance in
Arizona, with Hay House of California, and all over the country. I contacted Sunny immediately and began
taking her intuitive classes, such as her Angel and Mediumship classes. Sunny, who is my mentor, also conducts
personal conferences in her office and by telephone.
Unfortunately, in 2007 I suffered an
illness affecting my physical vision, i.e., my intuitive vision remained the
same. Nevertheless, to my chagrin, I was
unable to continue with my work as a consulting statistician, i.e., the
mathematics, spreadsheets and long columns of numbers – essentially my
job. Still, I could write from time to
time, with eyes closed or while keeping my eyes off the screen. Now I am happy to report that I found a
doctor who has been treating the illness successfully for over a year. Because of this wonderful news and the
phenomenal happenings I have experienced since 2003, I am gaining in energy and
perseverance every day. Thankfully, I
have kept my detailed notes from “time immemorial” – tomes yet to be formalized
beyond this journal! I look forward to
the prospects with delight and appreciation for these renewed capabilities.
Since
my dear Max went to the light, our poignant, bizarre and often comical
communications have been rare.
Nevertheless, he still visits the earthly plane of existence from time
to time, most notably on special occasions.
You see, Max loves parties and get-togethers. What a communicator he was and always will
be! Other spirit beings have visited me as well: my dearly deceased father, his parents, my
step-father who recently passed at the age of ninety-five, angels as I prayed
in church, spirit guides, and loved ones of classmates and friends. Most of these beautiful encounters happened
subsequent to the writing of this journal and will be revealed in an upcoming
book. Nevertheless, a few of the
exchanges did take place in 2004 when I was first “introduced” to my spirit
guide. I am pleased to present these
stories in Death Is Not “The End”.
Journal Entries. My journal contains seventy-one entries,
beginning with the events of December 23, 2003 and ending with the unparalleled
event that happened on December 23, 2004.
Consequently, this volume contains stories concerning over fifty paranormal events, spanning a
year and one day. The last day is simply
too mind-blowing and personally meaningful to exclude from my account. Indeed, it is the sine qua non of the book!
Even so, many more events occurred in 2004. “Over fifty” refers to recurring events
because I did not document each type of event more than once. If an event happened several times, I told
the story just once. The most repetitive
events were “The Hair Dryer Affair”, Max “curling up” on the couch, “The
Toaster Trick” and Max’s appearance in the church gardens. Though I described the toaster trick in the
first month it happened, this incident occurred approximately two or three
times a week for many weeks in 2004, and on into 2005. I witnessed the phenomenal “toaster trick” at
least twenty times – a conservative estimate.
My
journal entries are based on uncanny, at times unnatural and often
extraordinarily meaningful events, such as mental, physical and spiritual
messages from Max, coincidental electrical events, and the untimely deaths that
occurred in proximity to Max’s passing.
In this sense, my journal is episodic in nature – unlike a diary or a
journal of daily activities, thoughts, and concerns. The overall narrative and the accounts of
others were written in the past tense. However, the paranormal and supernatural
experiences I observed were written in the present
tense to “glue the reader to the scene” as I revealed my thoughts and
feelings about the awesome happenings of the day.
Event Recording. Due to a meticulous bent brought on by
working with numbers, I included a date and, if possible, a time at the top of
each journal entry. In this way,
associations and interpretations can be drawn for a better understanding of a
particular event. Then because the moon
has an effect on nature, I also included phases of the moon. At the start, I hadn’t made the decision to
chronicle every observation or to keep track of dates. Later on, as I began to record the dates and
times, I expressed my apologies for being unable to recall a few of these
particulars. In these instances, an
estimated date or time was supplied, i.e, for example, 1/xx/04 or Wednesday
Afternoon.
All
of the paranormal and supernatural data and information were first logged as
events and then told in story form.
However, some of the information was subsequently removed from the
book. For example, if I witnessed an
event that I was later unable to recall in detail, the event was excluded. Likewise, I have excluded two separate
accounts received in early 2004 from two of Max’s dear friends, a man and a
woman. They are friends of mine as
well. Since then, I have been unable to
reach either of the two for corroboration.
So I decided it would be best to remove what they had first described to
me over the phone. However, I am able to
state with confidence that the first event happened to the man while he was
taking a walk in the woods about a week after Max died. The second event concerned a phenomenon that
the woman said she witnessed in my home while I was vacationing in Sedona. She had been “pet-sitting” while watching the
house. The nature of the details
surrounding each of these events is somewhat fuzzy so I must unfortunately
exclude them. However, I do know this: both the man and the woman told me their
stories with great enthusiasm. They both
appeared to have been stunned by what they had seen and heard. The dear man has since moved away and his
phone has been disconnected. And despite
my phone messages and invitations, my friend and confidante, the woman has not
entered my home since she witnessed the paranormal event. Now I am unable to reach her at all. Though my friends tells me not to wait, I
miss her and have hopes she’ll call me someday, perhaps when I least expect it.
Despite
all that has happened, I still bring a pen and a large pad of sticky notes with
me wherever I go. While writing the
first draft of Death Is Not “The End”,
I never thought, as a few friends suggested, that “the recording of all that
data” would be too tedious a task to stick with for long. Quite the reverse. I felt comfortable with it because the
happenings were either so beautiful or so wacky that I felt compelled to put my
observations down on paper. Keeping
track like this, I would then be able to tell my mother and friends what had
happened. All the same, I soon found
myself “fleshing out” the stories on my laptop – before work, after work, on
the Wednesdays of my four-day work week and on weekends too. In that sense, I was confident I wouldn’t be
relying on old memory.
Before
long, a book was born. Lives were
forever changed. Especially
mine.
Song Lyrics. The awesome events sometimes arrived with
a song – on the radio, while drinking coffee in a café, through musak, or while
working in my office. Quite a few of the songs, coupled with related
events, had a synchronistic quality and became a fundamental part of the
experience. Even today, as I recall
seeing Max’s spirit on January 3, 2004, I can still hear “Unchained
Melody”. This beautiful song was an
integral part of my supernatural experience because the song and the movie,
“Ghost” were on television. That’s
right. Approximately five minutes after
Max appeared on the arm of my sofa, I changed the television channel and heard
the song, “Unchained Melody”. There
before me was the movie, “Ghost” as Max’s spirit hovered just above the arm of
the sofa. I was stunned!
People
are incredulous when they hear this story, thinking it could not possibly have
happened. It sounds surreal, they say –
too perfect to be true. Objectively, I
agree with them, to be sure. But I am
here to tell you, to my absolute bafflement, it happened. And in all humility, it happened to me. Why would any person set herself up for
potential derision by writing such a far-fetched story unless it were
true? I certainly would not. My “Ghost” story happened as described. I cannot and will not delete this account
from my journal simply because it is too fantastic for people to believe. That, in point of fact, would be a form of
deception. I am only here to relay to
the best of my ability the unbelievable phenomena witnessed by my friends and
me.
Because
of activities that are “linked” like these, the inclusion of one or two lines
of lyrics tends to give people a more complete picture of the experience. The reader can then visualize and perhaps
even “feel” what happened from the perspective of the one who experienced it –
perhaps even “hear” the song as the observer heard it that day. Observing the required standards for abridgement,
these songs are an integral part of my journal and my journey. They add the dimension of sound to my journal
stories, i.e., the recollection of meaningful lyrics and melodies. Music lovers might even enjoy listening to
the tunes online as they read certain passages.
Post Scripts. The post script sections of this book
fill an important need. Post scripts
allow me to separate the actual events from comments and research concerning
the events. In this way, no true story
is ever changed or manipulated beyond revisions for clarity, grammar,
punctuation, style and the like.
As
I refined my journal, I expanded on the post scripts. There was a need for definitions, commentary,
and further research on paranormal and supernatural phenomena to shed light on
the most inconceivable and least understood events. Post scripts are primarily reserved for:
- My comments and questions
concerning an event
- Paranormal and supernatural
definitions and descriptions
- Key information from theories of
consciousness
- Key information from quantum
theory; for example, where an event seems to connect with, or have roots
in, a scientific model (such as string theory, m-theory and parallel
universes)
- Post scripts providing new
material, such as “Law of Attraction” concepts
- Logical analysis of an event
- Statistical analysis of an
event, where possible
- Interpretation of key events
In addition to the post scripts, Journal Entry 34 contains
information on quantum physics and “The
Theory of Everything” as related to
rare phenomena. Journal Entry 59
concerns “third eye”
information.
I
certainly do not pretend to have all the answers. In that sense, I do not attempt to analyze
and interpret every event documented in my journal. Some incidents are brief and appear to be
self-explanatory, in terms of typical conjectures set forth to make sense of
the event. Although I have attempted to
describe every event in detail, some events simply defy description and
adequate explanation. I have provided
post scripts after particular journal entries, as needed, along with comments,
questions, research, analysis, and where feasible, interpretation of the
event. I encourage readers to take a
stab at it. Get together with your
friends and mull over mysterious events.
Try to analyze and interpret the phenomena to your satisfaction. This is half the fun and joy of the
book. The other half is the incredible
stories!
Please note: Due to the sensitive nature of the subject
matter and as a protective measure, names were changed in the narrative
sections of the book, i.e., not in the Acknowledgments section. Nevertheless, the real names of a number of
people are in the narratives, as requested.
I retained my pen name and that of my deceased spouse, Max Blau, for my
journal. No person, place, nor story is
fictitious. Every happening hereby
documented is true to the best of my ability to capture the quintessence of a
paranormal event. Some events have truly
left me baffled. Yet, isn’t that what
makes life fascinating?
I
continue to keep records of rare and unusual events even into the year
2011. However, there is more than enough
to tell – based solely on what happened soon after my beloved Max died. I humbly present my story to you, my readers,
in Death Is Not “The End”: One Agnostic’s Journey on the Bumpy Road to
Belief.
Sincerely yours,
Mandy
Berlin
